Verrückt bleiben, verliebt bleiben
D 1997, 87 min
Torsten Ricardo loves riding the subway and spends every free minute doing so. In addition to this passion, he is a talented painter and actor. The film tells his story.
Synopsis
Torsten Ricardo Engelholz, 31 years old, was locked in a dark room by his parents for most of his childhood and then placed in a psychiatric ward. Torsten Ricardo loves riding the subway and spends every free minute doing so. In addition to this passion, he is a talented painter and actor in the professional theater group Thikwa in Berlin. He is highly interested in German history.
This film explores the universe of a very special person in a sensual way and deals with fundamental questions of life: Torsten Ricardo holds up a mirror to us. “The others are disabled, knowledge-disabled, because they don't recognize what abilities you have,” says Torsten Ricardo Engelholz in his poetic, clear-sighted language. This includes the abysses of his own existence as well as his great desires: “I could marry the subway, because it is faithful. It doesn't leave me. The subway always comes back, because it doesn't have a man and isn't taken yet. With women, I'm not so sure. The subway remains faithful to me.” — Elfi Mikesch
Elfi Mikesch, a cinematographer and director who has won numerous awards for her visual imagery, is considered one of the early pioneers of feminist-queer film. In her documentary work, she focuses on people and projects that fall outside the bounds of the norm, telling their stories of the search for identity and individual self-realization.
„One of the most extraordinary films in its genre“ - “Exceptionally Valuable” Rating by Deutsche Film- und Medienbewertung (FBW)
Upcoming
Ab 23. Juli auf DVD:
– Elfi Mikesch: Dokumentarfilme Vol. 2 (2 Films on 1 DVD): „Verrückt bleiben, verliebt bleiben“ / „Die Markus Family“
– Elfi Mikesch Collection: Dokumentarfilme (10 Films on 3 DVDs)
Streaming-Info
Rent or buy the movie on our Vimeo channel.
Language: German
Press reviews
In her documentary film Verrückt bleiben, verliebt bleiben, Elfi Mikesch gently yet intimately followed the now 31-year-old with her camera: his theater rehearsals for Woyzeck his drawn visions of urban planning, his painted dreams of freedom, and his subway romance. The result is a sensual, beautiful film that leaves the question of madness entirely to the poetic power of the subject. - Birgit Glombitza, taz
Rarely has a film found such a tender way into the inner world of a person's thoughts and feelings—a world that is usually deliberately overlooked. - Diagonale
Through understated imagery, Elfi Mikesch explores the world of a very unique individual, touches on fundamental questions of life, and puts the concept of normality into perspective.- Viennale 1997
Awards and Festivals
- Berlinale, Panorama, 1997
- Locarno, Semaine de la Critique, 1997
- Duisburger Filmwoche, 1997 - 3sat Documentary Film Award
- Minsk IFF, 1997 - Grand Prize for Documentary Film
- Minsk IFF, 1997 - Prize for Best Directing
- Kassler Film- und Videofest, 1997
- The Hamptons International Filmfestival New York, 1997
- Rotterdam International Filmfestival, 1998
- Barcelona IFF, 1998 - Grand Prize for Documentary Film
- Viennale, 2009
- Diagonale, 2011
- Neissefilmfestival, 2012
Additional Texts
Prädikat besonders wertvoll
FBW - Jury-Begründung
The judging panel felt that this is one of the most extraordinary films in its genre. In a fascinating way, a character is brought to life—one who is exceptionally gifted and extremely sensitive. The performance of Elfi Mikesch, the director, deserves special mention. She has clearly earned the trust of the main character, as she was able to connect with her in a very special way. It’s a delicate balancing act between connecting with this character and “putting her on display.”
Ultimately, everything Thorsten recounts and explains leads the viewer to reflect on their own self and their own life. As someone who is, in a sense, disabled, he even goes so far as to say: “Who’s crazy? Me or the others? And anyone who can’t deal with people with disabilities is disabled themselves.” In this respect, his perception of the world is a very special form of perception.
The fact that Thorsten, in addition to his sensitivity and above-average talent, also radiates and craves a great deal of love comes through in all his remarks. Everything revolves around warmth and love. His central motif is movement; everything is in flux (train rides / railroad tracks).
A minor objection raised by the evaluation committee concerns the few staged scenes, particularly the scene in the psychiatric ward and during his stay in Vienna. In the opinion of the evaluation committee, this represents a certain break in the film’s flow, but ultimately does not detract from the outstanding overall impression.
Credits
Written and directed by
Elfi Mikesch
Camera
Elfi Mikesch
With
Torsten Ricardo Engelholz, Mitglieder des Theater Thikwa, Annalisa Adami, Airan Berg, Martina Winkel, Fernando Grillo
Music
Laszlo Waszlavik, Ronald Steckel
Sound, Assistant Director, Script Continuity
Lilly Grote
Outfitting
Caroline Weihrauch, Peter Büsching
Editing
Heide Breitel
Sound Mixing
Pierre Brand
Negative-Editing
Cornelia Schümann
Camera Assistant
Ralph Netzer
Technical Assistance
Hannes Ickert, Volker Kirschenfauth
Post-Production Coordination & Video Editing
Matthias Behrens
Production Management
Istvan Imreh, Christine Maier
Production Assistant
Ellen Bickmeier
Production Management
Jörg Rothe
Commsissioning Editor
Werner Dütsch (WDR)
Producer
Annedore von Donop
Production
Mediopolis
Funded by
BMI and Filmboard Berlin-Brandenburg
Premiere (DE)
Februar 1997, Berlin, IFF – Panorama
DVD-Details
Elfi Mikesch: Dokumentarfilme Vol. 2 (2 Films on 1 DVD): Verrückt bleiben, verliebt bleiben / Die Markus Family
Extras
Booklet with an interview by Bert Rebhandl with Elfi Mikesch (2024)
Language
German
Subtitles
None
Region Code
0
System
PAL, Color
Rutnime
167 min
Image Format
4:3
Sound Format
Mono and Dolby Digital 2.0
Content
Softbox (Set content: 1)
Release
23.07.2026
FSK
12
